Breaking up with Whatever

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This year I didn’t make New Year’s Resolutions so I’d have nothing to break. I thought it’d be a good way to keep me from feeling like a failure.

Set no goals and therefore I will fall short of none.

Instead I did what I have done for the past few years. Pick one word. Just one word. And have that be the focus for my entire year.

There is about a month long process for me to pick a word. I think on it. I pray. I meditate over it. I pray. And then usually switch to another related word and begin the process all over again.

2014 has been the year of Whatever.

It seems like an odd word to pick. In the beginning it was very focused.

I was having some health issues in January. Whatever was my way of coping with them. It was telling God, “whatever is wrong with me, I will accept it and live with it.”

But God took my Whatever and made it something more beautiful.

He morphed it, and twisted it, and Whatever remained my coping mechanism through so many other trials this year.

Whatever made me ready to accept my husband leaving his job of 11 1/2 years.

Whatever helped me cope with the fear of him leaving without another job lined up.

Whatever left us open to any prospect about where we were to live.

Whatever helped me deal with the disappointment after we decided not to move, and allowed me to unpack the already packed boxes with grace.

Whatever let me support my husband as he quickly transitioned into a job that was never on his list of ‘dream jobs’ but one God provided for us.

Whatever made it easier to cut the budget as we took a 35% pay cut for now, in hopes for a better financial future for our family.

Whatever helped me cope when I got told that being a stay-at-home mom wasn’t a good enough job and that I needed to ‘get a real job’ if we wanted to qualify for food assistance for my family.

Whatever gave me strength as I helped my husband through a long summer working with a stress related injury.

Whatever allowed me to transition to being the wife who has a husband in school.

 

[Tweet “By telling God whatever, I moved from coping with what came my way to a year filled with trust.”]

I was open to whatever God had planned for me. It taught me to release control and be ready for anything around the corner. I planned, I prepared, but I wasn’t devastated when things changed.

Whatever has grown beyond me. It has been God’s blessing to me. Reminding me once again that He has plans for my life, and if I sit back and let them happen they are much better than if I had forced it my own way.

I’m not about to pretend that all our problems of this year have been solved. We are still on an extremely tight budget and living off our rapidly dwindling savings every month.

I still have dreams of moving but I know that isn’t going to happen anytime soon–unless God changes those plans for me.

I’m still helping my husband through this transition. Beyond his physical pain of using new muscles, he is missing his old co-workers. He was associated with the people at his last job for over 15 years (the last 11 1/2 as an employee). He saw some of them 5-6 times a week for multiple hours at a time for nearly half his life. Now he only sees them on occasion. It has been hard on him to put it lightly.

So while at the end of this month I’m happily breaking up with Whatever, our journey from this year isn’t done. There are things that are going to follow us for the next several years–perhaps the rest of our lives.

I now see with clarity why God helped me select Whatever.

It seemed so focused in January 2014, yet it was just a small bite of our very long year.

And I’m sure the word for 2015 is going to be the same. I had one picked out, but as of yesterday morning it changed again.

So I sit with it, I pray over it, I meditate with it, and I think.

Perhaps, perhaps it is the one. I’ll have to wait and see if it is still with me in a few weeks.

I’m excited to share with you and see what next year brings.

Will you join me? Start your journey with one word. Pray, think, and meditate, and with God’s help, choose a word that is going to be your focus of the entire year.

 

~Crystal

 

I didn’t come up with this idea. My One Word is a book written by Mike Ashcroft. It walked me through the process of selecting a word and shared stories of others who have also chosen their one word. I highly recommend it.

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